How did I do it? A nice long cry on my hubby's shoulders. Yep. Lovely way to start the New Year huh? I am just feeling so very overwhelmed right now. With my Dr's appointment coming up, several other things looming on the horizon, I just feel over loaded majorly. It also doesn't help that during the holiday's I get to pretend to be funny, happy, brave Tami. She gets to pretend that her life is great, that things that have happened in the last 2 years haven't taken a toll on me or my marriage. Sadly when the eyes are yet again turned away from us, things like the long cry happen frequently.
Don't get me wrong. There are times I'm fine and happy. But like I said in an earlier post, this cloud seems to just loom. It never seems to let up. Its always in the back of mind. Its just hard. The hardest thing I have been through in fact...
Anyways, my brain is scattering, and I am losing focus on this post, so I will go back to trying to enjoy my evening with my hubby. Hope all had a wonderful New Year. :)
Showing posts with label Holidays. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Holidays. Show all posts
Friday, January 1, 2010
Monday, December 21, 2009
'Twas a few days before Christmas...
...and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even my spouse.
The stockings are absent, not hung with care, 'cuz Santa doesn't visit when no children live there.
The cats were all snug in their little pet beds, visions of pouncing dancing in their heads.
And us in our PJ's, not a matching set, had settled in for Lost reruns watched on the net.
When out in the store's, there is such a clatter. That sometimes we forget that we even matter.
Away in a window people are having a bash, maybe even later we'll take out the trash.
The moon glows outside on the new fallen snow, clean and untouched by children's hands below.
When all of the sudden depression creeps in, and makes you just realize what could have been.
With a little old sob and a big old kick, you aren't sure this is the life you would have picked.
No children to shriek with gleeful delight, no children to quiet on Christmas Eve night.
And laying 3 presents under our tree, I can't help but ask the question why me?
Tears spring to my eyes, but I remember the reason, the true reason for this wintery season.
So I heard myself exclaim as I turned out the light, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight."
--Written by me, adapted from 'Twas the Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore
The stockings are absent, not hung with care, 'cuz Santa doesn't visit when no children live there.
The cats were all snug in their little pet beds, visions of pouncing dancing in their heads.
And us in our PJ's, not a matching set, had settled in for Lost reruns watched on the net.
When out in the store's, there is such a clatter. That sometimes we forget that we even matter.
Away in a window people are having a bash, maybe even later we'll take out the trash.
The moon glows outside on the new fallen snow, clean and untouched by children's hands below.
When all of the sudden depression creeps in, and makes you just realize what could have been.
With a little old sob and a big old kick, you aren't sure this is the life you would have picked.
No children to shriek with gleeful delight, no children to quiet on Christmas Eve night.
And laying 3 presents under our tree, I can't help but ask the question why me?
Tears spring to my eyes, but I remember the reason, the true reason for this wintery season.
So I heard myself exclaim as I turned out the light, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight."
--Written by me, adapted from 'Twas the Night Before Christmas by Clement Clarke Moore
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