What's the TRUTH?

My friend Vicki posted a blog about a Time Magazine article called Does Society Exaggerate the Joys of Parenthood? You can check out her thoughts here. And it got me thinking about some things.
First off, the majority of the "Facebook Mom's" that I am friends with, OFTEN complain about being Mom's. Now I may be biased because I don't have children, and don't have to face the daily grind of being a mom. And I also may be biased because I desperately want to be a mom and almost all of these women became mom's without much work. It just seems like maybe being a parent isn't all its cracked up to be? I mean, based off of what I read on Facebook, my answer would be yes.
Of course, there is the biological need to have children, which has enabled our species to thrive (wow that sounded really...scientific). And women seem to have an extra dose of this, I will say my need and desire to have children is much stronger then hubby's.
Also, it gets me thinking, and this is HUGE for me...will I still be as dissatisfied with life, even after having children?? Will I become one of those complaining "Facebook Mom's"? I mean everyone has bad days. I know I do!!! But if I go by what I hear of other women with children say, its WORSE with kids. I know some will argue, but what about the kisses and the I love yous and the grand kids and all those wonderful moments of having children bring to my life? I would say, you have moments like those being Childless. They just come from a different source.
Now don't get me wrong. I will never stop wanting children. I believe in having children, for personal and religious reasons. But I wonder at times if I imagine life a certain way and its just not going to be that way when those babies come? Will I find more satisfaction and joy out of life with the pitter patter of little feet that carry my DNA or my last name? That remains to be seen.
But...based off of Facebook (and Mom's I talk to or hear talking), my answer would be NO.
So please...weigh in with thoughts or comments...I am interested in hearing anything as long as its ADDING to the conversation.

Why not me....

Sometimes I feel Facebook is a curse and a blessing. I love being in contact with old friends, new friends, family. But inevitably people like to announce the BIG announcement. You know the one I mean. Such a thing happened tonight, on Christmas night. Some old friends from college announced they are expecting.
While I am so happy and grateful that they don't have to face the sad and hurtful road of infertility, I just can't help but question, why not me? Why was I chosen (if you believe in that stuff) to face this sorrowful path of uncertainty? Why can't this one thing just work out for me?
I tell Nate, I'm really happy for them, but also inevitably, the tears and mini breakdown comes. I started to wonder, if people would ever imagine when they posted a status like that, that someone would go through a breakdown. I really doubt it. And I'm not saying they shouldn't post that stuff. If it was me, I probably would do the same thing. But it just goes to show that we never really know what kind of effect our words have on people.
I'm still in a depressed funk. Its been a hard month for me. I'm glad Christmas is over. But as my next Dr's appointment is coming in just a couple of weeks, there is this rock sitting in the pit of my stomach. I don't know why...maybe nerves about being close to the surgery? I really don't know.
So far no symptoms of the big O. Things have been pretty quiet on that front. But I really think I have to face the fact that this isn't going to happen for me unassisted. And even that is a long shot. Sometimes I feel that I have recieved the answer (many times) that it just isn't going to happen for us. But it could be fear, and I have to have the peace of mind that I tried everything I could.
Christmas was great. Its such a short time though. The day always flies by and sometimes I wonder why we put so much emphasis on it. Besides celebrating the birth of the Savior, the rest of it is so unimportant. And I truly believe the TRUE meaning of the season is lost amid all the other things going on.
Well, I think I will go cry some more and wallow in some self pity. Maybe self medicate with some chocolate. Maybe not....