Friday, February 4, 2011

Why do we say this??

I was writing a post about my miscarriage, and like I have written MANY times I wrote, "I got pregnant last year for the first time in 6 years but I LOST THE BABY."
Why is this a common phrase for women who have suffered a miscarriage? Its not OUR fault. It really is nature's fault. So this sentence really doesn't make sense. But I wonder what effect it has on us subconsiously? Does it make us feel like it was in some way our fault? I know I have questioned it at times...and things like this that come out of MY MOUTH just add to the feeling of inadequacy.
Its insane that these common phrases are used, and we never think about the full impact of our words, even on OURSELVES. Sometimes we forget to take care of ourselves in the middle of taking care of everything else, and I have to think that words we say can hurt our OWN feelings at times, we are just to busy to notice.
I probably will still find myself using that phrase...but I really hope I can try to reword it when I do.
“The name of the game is taking care of yourself, because you're going to live long enough to wish you had.” ~Grace Mirabella


  1. You are so right. When I always mentioned the miscarriages to people it would be "I." My husband would always say, "we lost the baby." or "something was wrong." He never blamed me and always was supportive. It is hard not to think that you did something wrong. I remember crying that I took a too hot of shower and that was the reason. It is silly to think that now, but back then I was very serious about everything that I was doing.

    Keep taking care of yourself. I've really enjoyed this blog.

  2. I really like this thought - so true. I will never think about it the same way again. I also like the quote about taking care of yourself. Thanks for sharing - I hope you guys have so much fun on your vaycay!