Thursday, April 29, 2010

Glimpses...

Most Moms and Dads will disagree with this post, but to me it proves to me that my thought is accurate. I honestly believe that as Childless people we can get glimpses of what its like to be a parent. We have Furbabies who get sick, who need to be fed, and need attention. We watch our families kids, and at least I have watched them for sometimes a week at a time. So we learn what its like to lose sleep, to deal with emotional issues, to feel the tiredness that comes after chasing kids around for hours.
Today I had to take my precious baby Angel to get spayed. I sobbed....literally. I felt like my heart was ripped in two and I just could not stand leaving her there. So I got a glimpse of the heart wrench some parents go through.
But I firmly believe those who have NOT suffered with infertility don't know even in the slightest way what it feels like to be infertile. You just can't know. There is really no experience like it. I think about all the things, the endless doctor's visits, the medicines with all there side effects. The alienation by people you thought loved you and cared about you. (And I fully expect these people to want to be a part of our lives once we have kids, and they are in for a rude awakening...but that's a whole other post...) You feel defective. You wonder what the future holds for you, and it all the possibilities scare you. For me especially I think about when we are old...who will take care of us?? Who will help us when we are old and need help?? So far its looking like no one...
I have ran into people that have thought they could identify with infertility. But they were sadly mistaken. Why can't these people just accept they don't know, and want to learn more about how to support those who they know are suffering?
Even when I talk to mom's who "vent" to me how hard it is to be a mom, I know I can't understand in the way they do. I can think about the glimpses I have had when I have played the role of a parent. I think its just safe to assume when someone is talking, just caring is all that is required. Not advice, not some miracle cure that for some reason "no one" (ha!) has told us. Just remember we all need to feel someone cares. That's the most important thing...

3 comments:

  1. What an insightful post! I can't believe just how much Angel looks like my Olive! Hugs...

    Vicki

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  2. When you posted on Facebook that your kitty was having surgery and your heart was broken I was thinking exactly what you posted here. When you don't have children, your pets become your children. Even though we have Libbie we treat our puppy like one of the kids. We take him on trips and spoil him...just not as much as Libbie!
    I've missed going walking and catching up with you! I wanted to see how the Infertility Seminar went plus I miss your company! Anyways, know I'm thinking about you!

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  3. I totally agree with you!!! People can be so ignorant sometimes. By the way you have totally become my favorite! Thank you so much for coming by my blog you are so encouraging. I do have a before pic on there already but I am planning on updating them on the 10th after AF has gone away along with the bloating...lol! Thank you again.
    Tiff

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